It is what it is…

Over the past few weeks, and especially yesterday, we have received so many messages of love and support from our friends and family (and some from complete strangers). We are so thankful for this right now. Frankly, we need it and we appreciate it. Feeling the strength of so many hands on our backs has been comforting and has given us more strength to continue moving forward through this painful time. Many of you have asked what we need right now. I don’t think either Gabe or myself know the answer to that, but we do want you to understand our context, as it stands right now.

We know that many of you have read the media article yesterday and we are also aware that, within that article, the details of Teagan’s death were made public. However, Gabe and I have NOT read those details. And we don’t intend to do so. Gabe will be called to testify in November. Until he takes the stand, we have been asked to stay clear of the details of the trial and all the media surrounding it. This is to protect the integrity of his testimony. We have gone into this in complete agreement of this way forward and it is very important to us. Gabe’s strength and resolve through all of this is nothing short of inspiring and there is nothing that has changed his mind about staying true to the integrity of his testimony. Unfortunately, through all of the very supportive messages, I did see the cause of death yesterday. Thankfully, I do not know all the details and Gabe has asked me not to share the little I do know. An unbelievable situation we find ourselves in, but this is what needs to be done. I have a very loving and supportive friend who read that article for me, told me that it contained the details of how Teagan died (without telling me what they are), and told me that Gabe and I never need to read it. She said that the articles gives the monster a voice that she doesn’t deserve. She also told me that Teagan’s murderer will go to prison for a long time and that she is sure of.  This is what we are focussed on now. Our only focus, as it relates to this trial, is the outcome.

If you see any details of the trial or any media shared on Teagan’s Voice, you should know that neither Gabe nor I are managing the Teagan’s Voice Facebook page during this time. So, please do not assume that we have the same information that you have if you are following it. Kaitlyn is managing that account until further notice.

That being said, our extended family is going through some painful times right now.  My parents who have enough to deal with, are undoubtedly now worried about Gabe and I and the boys. Our siblings have to deal with the pain of what they read yesterday and their own grief and anger at the loss of their niece. Our Aunts and Uncles who love us and who love Teagan have to deal with their own pain – especially Uncle Don, Aunt Jeanne McGibbon as well as cousins Travis and Meghan McGibbon who have been in court every day and have shouldered that burden for all of us. We would have never asked them to do this, but they have done it. They have represented Teagan’s loved ones in that court room and they have heard things that they can never unhear. All of our family is impacted, so sharing a shoulder or a laugh with them right now would help us tremendously. There are many, many victims when a child is murdered.

We want you to know that we are very focussed on our beautiful family. And we hope you do the same.  Look at your kids/grandkids/nieces & nephews and really see them today. Be present with them – they are the greatest gift. Look into their little faces and hear their sweet musings on whatever has them occupied.  And, tonight, maybe give them a little extra ice cream after dinner – we know that Teagan would love the smile that would put on their faces!  There are many lessons to be learned from this terrible trauma and we will discuss those when the time is right. But, for now, we want you to understand that we don’t know as much as you do about what happened to our beautiful daughter on December 10, 2014. Give us the opportunity to hang on to that until we are told the facts (without the bullshit). We are going to continue to live our lives through this time. We will go to work every day because it feels good and we will smile and laugh with our boys because that’s what they deserve from their parents. That’s what has and will continue to help us move forward through this. Love, support and understanding is all we need right now and you have been sending it to us. We thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

 

~Stephanie

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